American Idol Week 3 - Performance Night

Last night was the third and final round of performances, and frankly, I was underwhelmed by most of them, so let's get right to it.

Von – I don’t exactly understand the love for this kid. He looks kind of like a squished squirrel that borrowed some clothes from the set of Miami Vice. The judges previously berated him for being too “shouty” but I really didn’t hear much improvement this week. It was difficult to hear his unremarkable voice singing a Marvin Gaye song. Simon compared him to Clay Aiken and with any luck, he’ll have his music played in shopping malls across the country, come out of the closet, and only make headlines when he donates his sperm. I think he’ll score with young girls, so he might make it through.

Taylor –I don’t remember this girl at all, and I don’t think I will after tonight. Funny how later Simon forgot there was someone named Taylor that performed. She picked Alicia Keys, and, well, you can’t pick Alicia Keys and butcher it like that if you want some votes. I think this is the last we’ll see of her.

Alex – I had high hopes for this kid, as it’s always kind of fun to have a geek in the mix. Not Sanjaya or Archie, but a real, bona-fide geek. But apparently, he just hit puberty and smoked a pack of cigs before his performance, ‘cause his voice was all screechy-growly, kind of like my Dobie when she wants something. But she doesn’t get a reward until she’s quiet. Maybe Alex can take a cue from her.

Arianna – Of all the ABBA songs in the world…*sigh* I actually like Arianna’s look and her voice, but that song was like the soundtrack to a divorce, kind of middle-aged and depressing. Unfortunately, this is not the song that will get her through to the next round, but hopefully the judges will take pity on this “cute as a button” singer and give her another chance.

Ju’Not – OK, so he performed “Hey There Delilah” in Hollywood, and seemingly “stripped it down” for this performance. However, I was not a fan of the R&B “spin” he gave it, and I grew bored after the first minute or so. I don’t doubt that he can sing, but I’d like to see him with a little more vibe. Good enough for a wildcard.

Kristen –here’s the girl that lost on “Nashville Star” – but was it because she can’t sing, or because she’s not “country enough” (Read: Kendall Beard). This girl definitely has a voice, and I kind of like her awkward, hopeless, style-lacking image. But she loses lots of cool points for her ghastly arrangement and over-singing of “Give Me One Reason.”

Nathaniel – is there really much I can say about Nathaniel? He one-upped Nick/Norman with a sparkly headband –his version of Homo Flashdance? (Did Simon and Kara just refer to him as Richard Simmons? Nice!) And to be honest, he’s a little to chubby to wear skinny jeans. (So am I, but I don’t go around wearing them!) Oh, I’m supposed to talk about the song, right. He sang “I Would Do Anything For Love,” but Simon thinks he would, even though he just killed that song, and not in a good way.

Felicia – Seriously, the judges let this girl go? So far, I think she’s the only one with a nice voice, even though her song is a little karaoke. Another Alicia Keys, a better choice IMO, but she didn’t play up the uniqueness of her sound enough. Next time I hope she chooses a really daring song that really showcases her voice. Yes, I said next time – I hope she goes through, but if not, I think she’s definite Wild Card potential.

Scott –I wasn’t expecting much when he said he’d be singing “Mandolin Rain,” but I think he did a fair job. Definitely one of the top men thus far. I’m glad that someone dressed him in a collared shirt and vest, but equally appalled that they continue to promote his electro-shock hairdo.

Kendall – If you’re going the country route, please pick something a little less in-your-face, or even something non-country that you can put a southern flavor on. Carrie Underwood did exactly that 4 years ago and won. But sticking to mainstream country will be the kiss of death– just look at Kellie Pickler or Kristy Lee Cook.

Jorge –I have nothing against Jorge, or his heritage, or even his accent – heck, Enrique Iglesias sure makes it work for him—but I just don’t see this sweet guy going very far in the competition.

Lil – She goes last, the final contestant to be pimped by the judges. It’s pretty safe to say she’ll come out the clear leader this week, joining the ranks of Danny and Adam. She sings a Mary J. Blige song, but she doesn’t make it her own. She’s a great singer, but needs to prove that she’s young, fresh, and current.

In my opinion, this was the worst group by far. If it were up to me, I’d reluctantly keep Lil and pick two others from the previous groups and send the better ones straight to the Wild Card Round. – Jesse, Megan, and Anoop arguably deserve to be here over most of these contenders. Unfortunatly, that’s not the way it works, and three have to be chosen. For me, those three are Lil, Felicia, and either Scott or Ju’Not for the top male.

Wild Cards should go to Scott or Ju’Not, Kristen, Arianna, and Von.